Mother of the Year 2004

Deanna La June Laney would probably be every American man’s ideal wife: pretty, high cheekbones, delicate features, wears clothes well. She’s every bit as cute as her folksy little name.


Deanna La June Laney is also a murderer, having crushed her two older boys’ skulls with a 16 pound landscaping rock. She also permanently crippled her 14 month old baby.
Naturally, Deanna La June is being vigorously defended by her male attorney, F.R. “Buck” (I kid you not) Files, who is offering the defense that G*d made her do it, or that she thought it was G*d’s will that she crush her children’s heads with a rock.
I can understand why Deanna La June and the legal profession think she should be acquitted, because in the United States, a pretty woman and most any rich white man can pretty much walk away from responsibility for any crime, even murder.
What I don’t understand is the incredible stupidity of men who marry, and stay married, and have kids with the Deanna La June’s of this world.
Not that this is a news flash, but fact is, when American men make a decision to wed or to bed, it seems to have everything to do with showing off female bodies that will make their friends salivate and very little to do with anything else, like, for example, sanity or decency.
Deanna La June attended church where her brother-in-law, Gary Bell, is the pastor, according to The Associated Press.
“This was a brutal and horrific incident that has changed our lives [and will] for years to come,” Bell said during a service Sunday. “But we all believe as a family that this wasn’t our Dee that did this to her children.”
Oh, of course not. We all know that pretty women can never really do anything bad. It must have been her ugly twin, you know, the one goes through life with values that Deanna La June could never, ever imagine. Starting with feeling simple gratitude for the unimaginable privilege of being a wife and mother. Not to mention being held in such high esteem that her community is in complete denial that she could ever, ever do anything wrong.
My gosh, I’d like to have that experience for five minutes, let alone a lifetime.
Meanwhile, the idiots in the Massachusetts legislature are now on record that gay couples will threaten the profoundly holy institution of marriage which is the very foundation of our society, yea, of civilization itself.
Heaven help us all.